My Macrocosm

Those who know me, know that I hate cooking. Baking...I can handle, but cooking, I absolutely DREAD. Tonight, after tasting Kate and Kevin's delicious mashed cauliflower, I decided to take it upon myself to make my own. A healthy alternative to our perference of buttery mashed potatoes.

So I consult Kevin, getting all the seasonings and directions under my belt. Turns out- "mashing" isn't as easy as just putting things in a blender. My blender wasn't adequate for pureeing steamed cauliflower, so I put the half-chewed pieces into my food processor, which could take about 1/2 cup at a time. So after chopping it up to a grainy substance, I put it all back INTO the blender it started in and tried blending it. The bottom inch got it pretty good. While the rest of it stood still and stuck close to the walls of the blender. So I added milk. (which Kev said not to do) and suddenly cauliflower juice slowly began leaking out the bottom of the blender. So I tried to thicken it up a bit by adding butter (which I'm also sure, isn't helping with the healthy part) and it turned smooth, but was quite runny.

There's something about wanting something bad enough that you will make it yourself, then you spend so much time preparing it, and having contact with it, that by the time the final product is ready, you are just plain disgusted by it. Like Steve Carell on "40 Year-Old Virgin" when he makes his egg salad sandwich.

So Jack is downstairs, he had a couple bites and now he's smearing it all over my table.