Thirty, Eighteen, Twenty-Five.. whatever.

I turned 30 on May 20th. I've had lots of great jokes- like Josh getting me "Over the Hill" balloons, lots of "Happy Birthday Granny" or "Have a great day, saggy mama.."

Super fun comments indicating that though 30 sounds old, it really isn't. Which I completely agree, and to tell the truth, I've felt 30 since I was 17. Many people have asked "so does it feel different to be 30" and I just think to myself.... not really.

In high school I was ITCHING to get out. I felt like I was around a bunch of crazy kids making stupid choices and causing unnecessary problems. Then college was nice, better; people actually following rules and making better decisions. When I met Josh and knew in my heart I was going to marry him I thought "wait, I'm only 22.." but again, FELT much older. So it seemed alright. Then that led to Jack. Childbirth, parenting. That was probably the time I felt my age the most, but fought through it to become a mature, role-model for my son.

Thirty isn't bad. Age doesn't matter. Things change, yes... eyes grow "feet" and legs grow "cottage cheese" but I honestly feel that the best is yet to come. I'm still learning and I have a lot of time to become a wonderful person.

Here's to THIRTY! Cheers.

Special thanks those truly thoughtful gifts.. you know who ya'll are.

Lucky Number Seven

MAN, am I glad the weather on May 19, 2004 was better than it is in 2011.

Seven years ago I married the man I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.

I really do love him.

No mushy stuff, no lists of why, and no stories about our courtship. This one's short an simple. I love him.

Happy Anniversary, Dear. Here's to lucky number seven.

The Moments that have Improved Motherhood.

Big brother's don't have to be human.

Even the messiest messes can be cute. Most messes Jack makes are result of curiosity or creativity. I embrace his passion for art, his desire to draw stars all over the walls, his need to put stickers on everything to make them "look better" and his wonderful ability to recreate something he has seen on paper.

Christmas can be just as much fun as it was when I was little. Being able to see the excitement and feel like a kid again is one of my FAVORITE parts of being a Mother. I love showing Jack all the things I used to do as a kid, build huts, draw hopscotches with chalk, make banana splits, and sleep in the bath tub..

Jack has always been a great impersonator. I love being able to watch first hand as he tries to be "like mom" or be "like dad."

Terribly adorable.

I love the feeling of being a "proud parent" and when my little boy makes me proud, I feel most like a Mother.

Sometimes I am the Mother of two.. but it is wonderful to have someone that can be the kid that Jack needs to play with. This happens a lot, which means my motherly duties are many, but it is more than worth it for my two boys.

I'm the luckiest Mother in the world to have such a great road tripper. Jack will go on 6-7 hour car rides and it will almost be as fun as the trip itself. When I was young I was stuck in between my brother and sister in the backseat for hours and hours. I probably put up more of a stink than I should have. But it makes me all the more grateful to have a boy that loves to road trip to Vegas. Many, many times.

My motherhood was raw during these times, times when I would sit by and let people poke my boy with needles, inject tubes in between his ribs, and send him off with strangers dressed in scrubs to open him up and put him on bypass. No Mother should have to give that kiss goodbye, but those moments helped make me the greatest Mother I could possibly be.

All Mother's learn the lesson that unapproved haircuts are inevitable. It usually happens more than once, making you feel like you've messed up twice. But really- it's ok. Especially when you have a boy :)

I learned early on that sleeping by my mom made me feel safer. Although I like my sleep, my space and my quiet, I'll help provide Jack that same feeling of safety and comfort whenever I can. Some of the best moments of Motherhood are watching my baby sleep, safe and sound in his bed.

The greatest lesson of all- it's ok to have my 5 year old son be my best friend. We spend all day, and sometimes all night together, we tell each other everything and we share in each other's sorrows and silliness. Whatever will I do when he doesn't need me as much?

I'll savour these Mother's Day's and enjoy every moment.

Mystery Lifeguard

While in San Diego, Jack and I spent a whole day at the pool while Josh dealt with the car issues. Around lunch time they had life entertainment and a friendly man with dreds came out with his steel drums to play the plinky, plunky music that makes you feel relaxed somehow.

To my surprise, I recognized one of the songs and was humming right along... it took me awhile to figure out what it was till I started singing aloud.

"Mys-ter-y Lifeguard....they call me Mys-ter-y Lifeguard...."

I said "JACK! Do you hear this song? And he (as though it was no big deal) said "Yeah it's Backyardigans."

I was so confused to how the nice rastafarian man knew the Backyardigans song. Usually- they write their own music. On occasion they use other tunes. So came home and investigated to find out that "Mystery Lifeguard" is written to the tune of "Guantanamera" which is written by a Spanish gentleman. It would have been super awesome if the guy was a huge Backyardigan's fan, like I am- (I have other songs downloaded) but at least this was an educational experience.

I still love it. But now I know why I can't download it.

Birthday Boy

Today is Joshua's 35th birthday. He's learned so many new things this past year and we are really proud of him. This will be a big year for him and we are very excited for him and very proud of him. We love you Josh, Happy Birthday. Keep growing up to be the BIG boy that you are!

Where did you go? Why were you there?

To sum up the trip we just took takes too long... so I bundled pictures together to represent the most notable events. Being that this trip was spontaneous and unplanned, the day to day activities were chosen on a whim, and the amounts of time spent at each place were unknown.

First, we took off early for Las Vegas, deciding two nights were better than one. My dear friend Kim and her husband Nate live in Henderson. A place I would seriously consider moving to. Seriously. They have two daughters and a baby boy on the way. Jack and Ireland (their 4 year old) get along beautifully. She plays hard, so it's nice to not have to remind Jack to "be soft" when he is around her. They played at the park, we took them to the Shark Reef/Aquarium at Mandalay Bay, and bought them some Red Mango. It's a love affair that will grow on till they learn about cooties.

The Shark Reef at Mandalay Bay is always fun, we see different creatures, pet sting ray and I love photographing jelly fish. Something for everyone.

We learned in Vegas traffic that the overheating problem our car had didn't disappear with the winter months in Utah, it was just hibernating. We learned quickly to identify the needs of the Sentra and turn the heat on full blast when the car was idling in traffic or at stop lights, and to keep an extra bottle of coolant in the trunk. (Which didn't open.) So on the drive to Los Angeles we paid close attention to the temperature. "Good thing we had those belts replaced at Jiffy Lube before we left.." we both said to each other. Having booked our Hotel at the Angelo the night before, I was excited to be so close to the Getty. Jack and I have been there before, although this time around was a bit more difficult; Jack not being entertained only by new places as easily,but needing 'games' and 'kid things' to keep him happy.

Being that we had only one night booked at the hotel, it was relief when our old, reliable friend Cole invited us to stay at his house in Sherman Oaks. He and his fiance' Jill have a great place and the cherry on top, was Miles, their labradoodle. Though cautious at first, he and Jack developed quite a relationship and before we had even sat down were playing fetch and and doing tricks. We drove to Malibu to hit the beach but it was pretty breezy. But this part of the trip was delightful thanks to farmer's markets, bakeries, good friends, and canines.

The drive to San Diego was great, no overheating like in the horrible traffic in LA, and the temperature was perfect for windows-down driving, and Jack slept a large part of the time. We booked ourselves at the Bahia, the hotel next to the routine hotel Dana that we typically stay at. It was beautiful. The weather was warm and we couldn't wait to get in the pool. The next morning after a large breakfast.. Josh noticed a belt hanging from underneath the car. Nice work Jiffy Lube. So the rest of Josh's day was spent at the Jiffy in Mission Bay, where they found damaged and missing parts from what we were told was repaired by the Salt Lake Jiffy crew. They ended up sending Josh over to a mechanic to fix it. (Why not get the overheating issue taken care of as well... yes?) That will take an extra day. So we book another night at the Bahia and extend our stay to fix the 11 year old Sentra. So many hours and many dollars later, it emerged from a garage with a new lease on life and a desire to be driven hard.

So back to Vegas we went, tired and worn from the long haul with the car. We saw Rio, and took Jack to the splash park. We decided with no hesitation to stay an extra night in Vegas. Kim was pleased, so we could take some baby-mama photos of her. I was pleased cause it was snowing in Salt Lake. Jack was pleased because he thought he lived there. Josh was pleased- because he can essentially work from anywhere, but there were contacts in Vegas. We took the kids to the "Natural Museum of History", got Kim's photo shoot done, and the last night we got to stay at "The Orleans Hotel and Casino" free of charge. Not too shabby.

The only real loss on the trip was a load of laundry that may have been sabotaged by a senseless stranger, a toy from McDonald's, and Peedie, our fish that died while we were gone. Oh well.

When I was your age...

Lately, and frequently, Josh and I are watching pieces of ourselves pop up in Jack. I've noticed such things as the thrill that comes over you when you learn how to draw or spell something. When I learned how to spell my name, I wrote it all over our house. I was probably five, just like Jack. I can still find my mark on the inside of my mom's bathroom drawer. Jack learned how to draw a star and drew them all over the walls and the banister.. and the fireplace. I also remember having my feelings get hurt whenever a door was closed on me. My dad would close his study door, or their bedroom door and I'd always take it personally. Since I've started favoring privacy at appropriate times (Jack IS getting older...) Jack will cry whenever we close a door on him.

One night I got out of bed to check on Josh, who was on a very late-night business call. When I walked to the end of the hallway I found Jack asleep by Josh's office door. Sometimes if I had a bad dream, or couldn't sleep, I'd grab a pillow and a blanket and sleep by my parents' door. The flickering light from their TV would shine through the bottom and it was strangely comforting. I can imagine that the sound of Josh's voice on the phone made Jack feel safe.

This evening- Jack pulled something that BOTH Josh and I did as little kids, perhaps EVERY little kid has done this at one time or another. For some reason it's fun. But I felt the need to photograph and label the event.

Jack designed himself a new room in his bath tub. It came complete with all of Jack essentials, listed below.

1. His jacket, hung on the hook meant to hold the squeegie, that actually goes in our shower.

2. His juice cup, sitting comfortably in the soap dish.

3. Jack's library books, we read every night.

4. BOTH penguin pillow pets, large and small.

5. A spatula. That's beyond me..

6. His socks, waiting for him on the toilet seat.

7. The chair, for visitors.

8. (Not Shown) His cup of Apple Jack's.

I can't help but admit it looks really comfy in there, with the feather down nestled in the small bath tub, enveloping whoever sits in it... but, it's Jack's new room.

Hair Cuts.

When I was about 12 or 13, I needed a hair cut. This is the earliest haircut I remember, though when I was eight (despite my extremely naturally curly hair...) I got a perm. I still don't understand why that happened. But this hair cut as a pre-teen, I remember well, because my mom took me to Fantastic Sam's on Fort Union. Out of all the Super Cuts, Sport Clips and other "get the job done" places, I'm not sure why she chose Fantastic Sam's.

I remember them treating me like an adult, asking me if there was anything I'd like to read while I was getting my hair done. They made small chit-chat about school while I was being shampooed and rinsed. I felt very special like I was at the "Salon" now, where it wasn't just about getting your hair cut but about the whole experience, and walking away feeling like new. I began to really like it.

When the cut was finished- this is where everything halted in slow motion, my confusion set in, and knew I would never return to Fantastic Sam's again. They asked me to step off the chair, then bend down and pick up a lock of my hair that had just been chopped. Then, they led me to a wall with a tiny little door, with a knob, and told me to put the hair in it. Totally grossed out and concerned about why I was cleaning up my own mess, I put the hair in and heard a sound. They all looked at me with excitement and I suddenly felt like I was 6 as they motioned for me to open the door back up. Inside was a lime green, plastic bracelet. Not hiding my complete disappointment and resentment that the people that had made me feel so grown-up were turning their backs on me to make me feel like an infant, rewarding my "good behavior" with a cheap prize, I picked up the bracelet and went home.

Since then I've spoiled myself in this department. I have spent exorbitant amounts of money on my hair, only for a small allotted time in my life. The result were good, but certainly not worth the money. The hip music, products, and hair styles of the stylists themselves were enough to make me feel good about opening up my wallet.

Nowadays, I have settled in with a good friend who cuts my hair. The thing I like most about her is that her cuts and colors get better with age. I get more compliments a few weeks out from my cuts and colors, rather than right after I get them. They are long lasting... and well worth any money or effort. That's hard to find.

Jack is my new worry. I've been taking him to Cookie Cutters where they go way out of their way to make the kids happy, with movies, fun automobiles to sit in and balloons and candy. But Jack has past the point of needing to be pleased/distracted while he gets his hair cut. I'm hoping I can just take him to the Sport Clips next to Quizno's and get the pieces he's cut with his safety scissors evened out- for around $6. I don't feel bad about the price, and they certainly won't be asking him to pick up his gross, severed hair off the ground to redeem it for something. Perhaps I can learn how to cut his hair myself...

I'll google it later.

Viva la Peedie.

Our little Peedie is going on 3 years old. Typically when people revisit our house they ask "Is your fish still alive?" It is like he is some phenomenon. I can safely say he has lived longer than any other fish I have had. Or other water/tank creatures I've had. He is so tough. I've dropped him down the disposal 4 times. (Not while it was running, of course.)

I think another reason Peedie is still here, is his great relationship he has with Lucy. They have spent countless hours alone and Peedie is always left unharmed. In fact, Lucy prefers to get her water specifically from Peedie's bowl. I've never had to get her water, as long as I keep Peedie's bowl clean. She'll watch him, and she won't drink if he is eating. She's very polite. There has only been one occasion- and this is hearsay, that Lucy has ever dipped her paw in the bowl.

I'm not sure the record lifespan of a beta, but I wouldn't be surprised if Peedie goes for the record. He's a good fish.

"Wee"nagers.

I know I've already posted about feeling old, but this is something that SEEMS like it has changed. I see kids walking home from school all over the place by our house and I always ask myself "does their mom know they are out there walking alone on these busy streets?"

But then it occurs to me that these kids are walking home from Cottonwood HIGH SCHOOL and they are well past the age of having their hands held by their parents. They LOOK like they are 10 years old- but they are really 16.

I walked to school from 1st grade through 9th grade, and the distance to the Elementary school more than doubled the distance to the Middle School. I remember when my mom told me I was "lucky enough to walk to school like Carter and Laura." It seemed plenty safe, however, they would leave earlier than I and I was usually on my own, unless I met up with friends. These paths lead through huge fields of sage brush then down a wide residential road that was still dirt, not yet paved, then you crossed 11400 S. (safely if you were timely enough to catch the crossing guard) then you'd slip through an open corner of the fence that ran the large perimeter of the school grounds.

When I imagine Jack walking that far at the age of 7 or 8 I feel TERRIFIED and possibly very PARANOID that he won't end up where he is headed, he'll get lost or someone will flat out take him before he can get there. I'm not sure if we just lived in a wonderful classic age of "keep your doors unlocked" and "your yard is our yard" but the idea of sending Jack down Highland Dr. to walk to Elementary School each day doesn't seem like a viable option. I'm hoping that I'm not going to be one those parents that builds the bubble around their one, precious child; I'm certainly failing at that now- but hopefully as Jack grows up, I will learn that he is perfectly capable of taking care of himself. (Right?) Cause that doesn't seem imaginable right now.

Then again, I remember thinking it was unimaginable that he would ever eat solid foods. So, I should gain some perspective, I guess..